Why Doesn’t My Child Want to Eat?
By Dr. Roberto Albani, Paediatrician and Gastroenterologist
Trust Your Child’s Appetite: Why Eating Less Is Often Normal
Healthy children naturally regulate their food intake — they eat according to their needs and won’t starve themselves. It’s normal for them to eat less, especially during the transition from milk to solid foods. Forcing them to eat can lead to stress or even eating disorders. Unless there are clear signs of illness (like fever, vomiting, or lethargy), there’s usually no cause for concern. Parents should trust their child’s rhythm and avoid anxiety around meals.
Let’s respect their instincts
One of the most frequent questions parents ask me is:
“Why doesn’t my child want to eat?”
“Why does he/she refuse solid foods?”
It’s a major concern, especially at the beginning of weaning. For months, our child has only known milk, and suddenly we offer a spoonful of something new — something to chew, to swallow — and it’s often rejected. They eat very little. Sometimes, almost nothing. And that’s frightening: parents worry that their child might lose weight, stop growing, fall behind developmentally, or even suffer irreversible damage.
But let me say this clearly:
this fear is understandable, but in the vast majority of cases, it is unfounded.
Children Self-Regulate
Healthy children instinctively know how much food they need.
They don’t starve themselves, they don’t go on diets, and most importantly, their “hunger” is driven by the needs of their own bodies.
If there are no signs of illness — such as fever, persistent vomiting, or severe diarrhea — there is nothing to worry about.
It’s completely normal for the transition from milk to solid foods to be a bit challenging. It takes time for children to adjust and get used to new tastes and textures.
They may eat less, and their growth may slow down a little — but they always catch up eventually.
Every child is different. Each has their own rhythm and needs, determined by their individual constitution.
Some children resemble their parents: if the parents are tall and robust, the child will often have a good appetite too.
On the other hand, if the parents were small or slim as children, it’s likely their child will eat less and be more selective. That’s not a problem — it’s completely normal.
I often suggest to parents that they reflect on how they were as children — maybe even ask their own parents to notice similarities. And believe me, there are usually plenty.
Let’s remember: our role is not to force, not to worry too much, and especially to think about what we went through as kids when we were forced to finish our meals.
When I was a child, I had an uncle who would come to our house at lunchtime just to hit me in order to make me eat. The result? I still ate very little — because that was all I needed — and here I am, I still grew up just fine.
I’m naturally slim, and even today my diet isn’t particularly abundant.
At this point, let me open a parenthesis to warn those parents who insist too much on making their child eat. Food should be a pleasure — sitting at the table should be a moment of joy, not torture. Forcing your child to eat can lead to eating disorders. Food can become an enemy, and over time this may cause bigger, more difficult problems to resolve. So, be careful: it’s better to let a child skip a meal than to force them to eat — they won’t starve from missing one meal.
For more anxious mothers, I used to suggest keeping a notebook and writing down everything the child had eaten during the day — from a plate of pasta to half a cookie or a piece of candy. This helped reassure them, because at the end of the day they could see that their child had indeed eaten something.
This little trick also helped moms feel more at ease and not overwhelmed by anxiety or frustration.
Another reason children may refuse solid foods is that they are still very attached to breast milk, and they may need more time to accept new foods. But this is not a mistake. Breast milk remains a valid source of nutrition even in the following months, and you can continue offering it while slowly and gently introducing solid foods — without pressure and at the child’s pace.
When should we really be concerned?
Only if there are clear signs of illness, such as:
- high fever
- repeated vomiting
- persistent diarrhea
- apathy, drowsiness, or decreased activity
If, on the other hand, the child is visibly active, joyful, and curious — even if eating very little — it means they are fine. They’re simply finding their own rhythm.
In conclusion: let’s trust them 💙
👉Children don’t go on hunger strikes
👉They’re not on a diet
👉They don’t stop eating out of stubbornness
👉They are simply growing — and to do that, they don’t follow our rhythms or rules, but their own
Credit to Belproblema.com